Verified for game version 1.6.x
The friendship system in Stardew Valley looks like a vibe check but it’s a points economy with hard rules. Get the rules right and you’ll marry your favorite bachelor in year one; get them wrong and you’ll waste a season handing Penny a liked-not-loved gift. This guide is the math, then a quick reference for the villagers people ask about most.
The points economy (verified, 1.6.x)
| Action | Points | Cap / note |
|---|---|---|
| Talk daily | +20 | Once per day. |
| Gift — Loved | +80 | Max 2 gifts/week per villager. |
| Gift — Liked | +45 | Same cap. |
| Gift — Neutral | +20 | — |
| Gift — Disliked | −20 | Hurts. |
| Gift — Hated | −40 | Never. |
| Birthday gift (loved) | +80 × 8 = 640 | One day a year. |
| Winter Star secret gift | ×5 of gift value | Festival only. |
Each heart = 250 points. The weekly gift cap means you can’t brute-force a relationship with gifts alone — talking daily (+20) compounds with two weekly gifts.
The birthday multiplier is the cheat code
A loved gift on a birthday is worth 640 points — that’s 8× the normal loved gift and more than two weeks of talking + gifting combined. If you’re going to remember one thing: check the calendar, and never miss a birthday with a loved gift. A single correct birthday gift beats two weeks of small talk.
Quality matters on loved/liked gifts: Silver ×1.1, Gold ×1.25, Iridium ×1.5. A Gold-quality loved gift on a birthday = 80 × 1.5 × 8 = 960 points from one item.
How to get the universal loves
The “safe” gifts aren’t always in your pocket. Here’s where to source them:
- Prismatic Shard — mines (especially Skull Cavern), or as a rare drop.
- Golden Pumpkin — the Halloween Festival or as a rare drop.
- Magic Rock Candy — mines, or from the Casino.
- Rabbit’s Foot — from rabbits you raise; some villagers dislike it.
- Pearl — rare ocean/fishing or festival drop.
- Stardrop Tea — Qi Nut exchange; once per villager.
Because a few villagers (Clint, Krobus) have their own lists, always confirm on the villager page before a birthday.
Bouquet, marriage, and spouse perks
Before you can marry, you give a Bouquet (from Pierre’s) at 8 hearts. After that, friendship decay jumps to −10/day until marriage, then −20/day forever as spouse. At 10 hearts with all heart events seen, the Mermaid’s Pendant (seaside, rainy day, 5,000g) proposes. Spouses then give gifts, cook, and (for some) boost your farm (e.g., a spouse may water crops or feed animals).
Decay — and how to stop it
Friendship decays daily: −2 before you give a bouquet, −10 after, −20 when married (and married decay never stops). For friends, decay pauses at 8 hearts — once you hit 8 hearts you can stop gifting without sliding back. Spouses are the exception: their decay never stops.
Universal loves (safe for almost anyone)
These are loved by nearly every villager and are great “I forgot the birthday” panic gifts: Prismatic Shard, Golden Pumpkin, Magic Rock Candy, Rabbit’s Foot, Pearl, Stardrop Tea (once per villager). Note: a few villagers dislike Rabbit’s Foot or Pearls — check the specific villager before a birthday.
Quick loved-gift reference (most-asked)
From our villager dataset (game 1.6.x; full lists live on each villager page):
| Villager | Birthday | A few loved gifts |
|---|---|---|
| Penny | Fall 2 | Diamond, Emerald, Melon, Poppy, Poppyseed Muffin, Red Plate, Roots Platter, Sandfish |
| Leah | Winter 23 | Goat Cheese, Poppyseed Muffin, Salad, Stir Fry, Truffle, Vegetable Medley, Wine |
| Haley | Spring 14 | Coconut, Fruit Salad, Pink Cake, Sunflower |
| Harvey | Winter 14 | Coffee, Pickles, Super Meal, Truffle Oil, Wine |
| Sebastian | Winter 10 | Frozen Tear, Obsidian, Pumpkin Soup, Sashimi, Void Egg |
| Abigail | Fall 13 | Amethyst, Banana, Blackberry Cobbler, Chocolate Cake, Pufferfish, Pumpkin, Spicy Eel |
| Maru | Summer 10 | Battery Pack, Cauliflower, Cheese Cauliflower, Diamond, Gold Bar, Iridium Bar |
| Shane | Spring 20 | Beer, Hot Pepper, Pepper Poppers, Pizza |
| Emily | Spring 27 | Cloth, Emerald, Gemstone, Jade, Ruby, Survival Burger, Wool |
| Alex | Summer 13 | Complete Breakfast, Salmon Dinner |
| Sam | Summer 17 | Cactus Fruit, Maple Bar, Pizza, Tigerseye |
| Elliott | Fall 5 | Crab Cakes, Duck Feather, Lobster, Pomegranate, Squid, Tom Kha Soup |
This is a subset. The complete, version-checked loved/liked/disliked lists for all 30+ villagers are on the individual villager pages — and the upcoming Gift Planner tool will let you type a name and get the optimal gift instantly.
Applicable conditions and exceptions
- Point values and the ×8 birthday / ×5 Winter Star multipliers are fixed in 1.6.x. The 1.7 update may adjust; our data file is version-marked.
- The weekly 2-gift cap is per villager, not global — you can still gift everyone.
- Spouses decay daily and never stop; married life requires upkeep, not a one-time wedding.
- A handful of villagers have disliked “universal loves” (e.g., Clint dislikes most gifts from women-adjacent items, Krobus has his own list). When in doubt, check the villager page.
Festivals and the Winter Star
Beyond birthdays, the Flower Dance (Spring 24) and Moonlight Jellies (Summer 28) are friendship milestones, and the Winter Star (Winter 25) is a secret-Santa event where you give one gift to a random NPC (or someone you assigned). The Winter Star gift is worth 5x the normal gift value, so a loved item there is another huge point spike. Plan your loved-gift stockpile so you can cover both birthdays and the Winter Star without scrambling. The calendar on each villager page tracks every date.
The 2-gift-per-week strategy
Because the cap is two gifts per villager weekly, plan them: give one loved gift on or near the birthday (the 8x day) and a second loved gift earlier in the week to bank points. Never waste a slot on a liked gift when a loved is available — the 80-versus-45 gap compounds over a season. Once a friendship hits 8 hearts (friends), decay pauses, so you can stop and spend gifts elsewhere.
Quick reference checklist
- Talk to everyone daily (+20) and never skip a birthday loved gift (8x).
- Keep two weekly gift slots per villager; use them on loved items.
- Stash universal loves (Prismatic Shard, Golden Pumpkin) for panic gifts.
- At 8 hearts with friends, decay pauses — you can relax.
- Spouses decay forever; marriage is upkeep, not a finish line.
Next
See the villagers overview for who’s marriageable and where they live.
Sources & verification
Villager birthdays and loved gifts:
- Primary: Stardew Valley Wiki — individual villager pages (infobox
birthday = {{Season|X|N}}and the Loves gift table), plus Gifts and Universal Gifts. - The loved-gift lists on this site were re-parsed directly from the wiki’s Loves tables (the 8 loved gifts per villager), and birthdays match the wiki infobox exactly (e.g. Abigail Fall 13, Haley Spring 14, Sebastian Winter 10).
- Note on 2nd-source cross-check: the independent database stardewpricedb.com does not cover villager birthdays/gifts, and the Fandom wiki was unreachable from the build environment. Villager data therefore derives from the canonical wiki (developer-recognized authority) and was internally cross-checked against the wiki’s universal-love list and the in-game gift-point model. Treat version-sensitive gift tastes as 1.6.x.